alv
This experience has stayed with me for the last 5 years. more in a sense of shame than anything else, I don't know how many times I've written this story out then deleted it due to how this story ended..
Know that you can send questions, I'll answer them, whatever details that I may not recognize as I type this out in a stream of consciousness, I'll tell in greater detail when contacted. cut out whatever part you feel is excessive if you choose to bring this story to light. 

I'll start off with the base of my life.

I grew up with the ability to feel spirits/energies around me, I had a friend who was able to help me grow in understanding and how to (tune into) what's around me. Seeing things have always been rare. Small glimpses at best, but feeling has always been spot on.

This next part isn't something that's needed to know, just something that kind of shows a path to the night that something came from the void.

when I was 10.. maybe you can put this in a way that I can't, a pedophile did what they do. Growing up hearing God loves all his children. Didn't love enough to protect me. I grew to hate Christianity I practiced satanism, indulgence rather than abstinence and learning what I could from Crowley, Anton le vay along side of whatever obscure shit I could find. I've only been involved with one ritual, done by my mentor at the time. One that had nothing to do with summoning or opening seals, just a way to become linked with more than I could naturally. When it came to more extreme rituals like I was told that if ever you don't do everything right your life could be ruined and so left it at that.

Enough backstory

Years and years go by and I have this fiance, ton I could say about this but really it all ends in the same place, I fucked it up because of issues I had. She calls me late one night and tells me she's heading out with some guy. It's understandable even at the time but I was younger than I am, my issues lead to a fair amount of hate for everything and myself, I take a couple oxy and just set out for a walk, I head to a cemetery where I've gone to in the past. This peaceful place where when I've opened up in a spiritual sense and asked questions, I concentrate on how and where a feeling takes me its given me a sense of guidance in the past. This time though, I was too full of hate to clear my mind or center myself, I tried and tried but the more I attempted to, and failed the more things snowballed. I was calling out to any and all to help...all I felt was alone, like those who would acknowledge me had turned their back.


I had reached a point and just started to call out names, old names. Some of those whom I have read about in both Crowley's book of demonology and in king Solomon's book. Others from my mentor.

I don't know all the names I called out to or how many I called. 

But in a moment everything I was feeling was dwarfed by what felt like a shockwave/pulse I don't know how to describe it.

I had looked behind me and at first all that I was looking at was a gravestone, I knew that's where the pulse came from. I didn't have to wait long. like mist and shadow had taken form. This form being fingers coming up and over the 3 foot grave stone. Two hands came up and over, thin arms, then i saw eyes. The only way I can describe them is like small moons rising, these pearlescent eyes that I could not look away from came up and over along side of the rest of it. Something that should be said is the fact that even though there was a light not far from where we were, no light seemed to touch it's skin, nor did it ever cast a shadow. This small detail is one I still don't understand but it stands out. It crawled onto the pathway that I was on and had stopped maybe 20 feet away feet away from me. It seemed to sit, there's no real way to make out any definition on its body, in truth it was one of the things I couldn't concentrate on. All I really remember was keeping eye contact with it. I couldn't look away, I wouldn't call it hypnosis, they weren't like anything I had ever seen. A dark silver gray, the light didn't seem to have any effect on it's eyes. no reflection or anything like that. I wish I could accurately describe this to you. Words cannot express what they were.. it just sat looking, as if curious and patient. At this point I have all these questions, this torrent of emotions (astonished/terrified/joyful/proud) to name a few, I have all these things I want to say all these things I want to ask all these things.. but I couldn't get any of the words out from my throat.

To put it in a relatable way, a christian had just seen an angel..

I stopped for a second and held my eyes shut, when I opened them this entity was exactly where I last saw it. Something about this gave me some control over myself. At this point still I couldn't speak, but I was able to kneel, my right knee finally on the gravel it inched it way closer, as if to say at your own speed we'll continue. Some sense of synchrony. Moving closer as my knee did. This torrent of thoughts and emotions were increasing dramatically the closer it got. I tried to right hand over my heart and now my head. My When it was all of maybe 6 feet away it hit me, one thought..one thought was so much louder then all the things I wanted to say and everything I was feeling.

I don't know what this entity is.

The moment this thought hit, It stopped. As if though it could read my mind. A second or two goes by and it takes an aggressive  posture. My heart sinks, I can't ignore or stop what I know I'm about to do. I inhale, turn and run....


It was as if all the rest of the sounds around me came crashing back. I burst through the trees and ran, easily pacing me, this thing could have easily have caught me, I think why it chose not I'll explain in a second. I ran through orchards, as it went from tree top to tree top, branches sounded like this thing had mass, limbs cracking and leaves scuffling and it was making sounds I've never heard, in a way that shouldn't be possible. Like several pitches at once. eventually I ran out of the orchard back onto the road and oddly straight in the path of a sheriff's car. I don't know who called him, the place where I was at was secluded and run down. Maybe it was just his rounds, thing is, we don't have a sheriff's department near by. I don't remember much of the conversation, my mind was still flooded by everything that had just happened. I remember getting into the car and being dropped off in town, told to get home and he took off.

I have never seen the entity again..

The shame I feel for running away.. It haunts me more than any part of this story. Most my life I've wanted something like this to happen, but with the outcome to be much different. Here was this entity who traveled beyond this plane of existence, Hell, lower dimension.. whatever..it came..

It chose to answer the call...I had no offering, I had prior training, I wasn't prepared. It came and I fucking ran. I beat myself for this. Everytime I think of this story, it hurts. I've thought of calling out once more, but if I can't steady myself for a second time, I don't know what would come of me.. 

Fuck..
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Darkness Prevails
@alv Please do not post your story more than once and do not post a story with black text. I've amended these issues, but please keep them in mind for any future submissions. Thank you!
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